The Violence of Inaction

First posted on Substack: May 27, 2023.

The things directly impacting my personal life seem less important than direct violence. But what’s going on here is indirect violence.

It is passively detrimental in that it destroys lives through exploitation, greed, and cutting corners.

When I break down the details, it’s overwhelming, but everything adds up to a story about oppression.

I grew up in a suffocating environment. There are countless barriers to getting ahead. I will never actually “catch up” in a way that will satisfy the expectations of a culture of overwork.

It’s no wonder that I’m burned out already and I’ve only been able to write once a month or so.

I don’t even know what happened to April – for the first two weeks I was working on finishing up the fellowship, and then I was knocked flat with the worst pain flare of my life.

I didn’t really think about it that way until it passed, but it’s true.

I couldn’t even think clearly enough to realize how bad the pain was. It made everything a haze of noticing the burning in my muscles and joints.

It is violent to deprive patients of pain relief because it is violent to stand by when someone is being hurt.